I've always thought that gays were nothing but a bunch of sissies wearing polka-dot panties, but it turns out I was horribly wrong. You live and learn, fuckers, live and learn! I chose to review bullyhim.com simply because I wanted to discover the other, rougher side of this whole gay ordeal, and I assume that there are some horny freaks out there who dig the bully vs. nerds thang. Maybe you've been rocking math and science your whole life, secretly hoping that some muscular stud would bang some sense into your nerdy brain. How the fuck should I know what goes inside a homo brain of yours!
Anyhow, this is yet another chance for me to prove that I have nothing against gays and that all the bullying that takes place in “schools” looks much better when shot with a pristine camera. Here comes bullyhim.com, a wicked joint that requires payment to unlock its doors, but it really presents one-of-a-kind porn that can't be found anywhere else on the web. I mean it! Keep reading!
When the school bell rings, the bullies come out!
You are a gay nerd who gets bullied by a big-dicked hunk all the time, but there's no one who could save you. If you shout for the principal, you risk a threesome, and if the janitor shows up, you risk a threesome and a rake up your ass. Your only option is to surrender, turn around, and spread your butt cheeks. In the best possible scenario, you get away with a blowjob. Oh, no need to call for the teacher either. I find it sad that all the employees and staff of this wild school are males. While I wipe the tears off my face, I find the necessary nose of amusement in bullyhim.com's attempt to present this freaky scenario as something that really happens in real life.
When it comes to the website design, it's a standard one for a gay premium joint. A black background, a hot slideshow, and a couple of basic options in the main menu. No ads or any disturbances of that kind. Of course, bullyhim.com puts the emphasis on its latest releases. Thumbnails show a short video preview and the names of each of the pornstars included, both bullies and victims (the expression used by bullyhim.com). You know, I feel like I'm walking in the SEO minefield over here, so let me just note very clearly that all of this bullying bullshit is nothing but a scenario, and the participants are nothing but actors. Gays, but tame gays, just as we all like them.
A part of a famous gay network
Have you fuckers ever heard of Say Uncle? Series like Family Dick, Missionary Boys, Yes Father, and Latin Leche? Any bells? Well, let me just say that Say Uncle is a fucking giant, a mega collection of porn, and a fucking factory of fetish series. Bullyhim.com is just one part of it, one series that focuses on bully porn. Now, once you are aware of this fact, I can announce that bullyhim.com has a total of 28 videos in its collection. Definitely not enough, but in situations like these, one membership plan unlocks the whole network. Don't worry about porn! You'll have plenty of it on Say Uncle.
I know that bullyhim.com looks exactly the same as all other series coming from the network, but that doesn't mean I have to like it. I don't know anything about the site's updating schedule because it simply decided not to disclose this fact. It might not be as relevant as on premium websites that stand alone, but it's cool to point the date out whenever possible.
I don't need to go premium to access any porn (even the gays open their doors to TPD), but if you look at bullyhim.com from the simple visitor's standpoint, you'll realize that the site lacks the about us section and at least a glimpse of filtering tools. What would have happened to you gays if it wasn't for me to write an in-depth review? You'd be lost in the limbo of doubt for the rest of your ass-banging lives.
The content is fierce
One of the videos shows a janitor. He hides a muscular, tattooed, hair-free body underneath his uniform, and he puffs a smoke while he swipes classroom floors. He is pissed, horny, and in need of a tight-ass nerd. He finds a backpack and takes some money out of it when the sissy boy appears and starts whining about his lunch money. The Alpha dude whips his cock out, makes the nerd blow his dong, and shoves the wet tool deep inside the guy's asshole. He unloads his balls inside. Bareback action that will cost me at least one session at my shrink's, but you homos are gonna love this shit. It's raw, but the picture quality is insane. It's rough, but there's no slapping or birching. Hardcore gay porn with a twist.
All videos can be streamed and downloaded, if you are a member, of course. The same goes for galleries. Each video comes with a downloadable set of good-looking photos. A pretty standard procedure for all premium websites. No matter how much I make all of this punishing ordeal sound odd and freaky, this kind of stuff happens in straight porn all the time. Look at that nerd getting banged by a school police officer! The exact same thing happens when a chick goes shoplifting! Those dudes drill those cunts and assholes until all diamonds worn by the entire female popularity falls out, but nobody calls that harassing. A hardcore way to learn a lesson. That's all it is.
How much money does all of this cost?
It's nice to see a one-day trial as an option, especially on a website that offers so little info. The thing is that these options usually don't unlock all of the content that the network has to offer. Think of it as a sneak peek inside the whole collection, but that's something you could pretty much do just by watching the trailers. The price for a one-day trial plan is $1. The second membership plan is a monthly one, and it comes with a price of $0.99/day (billed in one payment of $29.95). The yearly plan is $0.27/day (billed in one payment of $99.95). The SayUncle unlimited plan will chip off $349 in one payment, which comes to $0.96/day. You can pay by credit card or PayPal.
The things that members get are daily updates, access to over 46 adult series, all of which focus on gays, 1080p and 4K videos that can be streamed and downloaded, and access to over 2.5K videos. In situations like these, when you gain access to the entire network, you don't have to worry about diversity.
Let me tell you that some of these series are freaking kinky, covering a lot of taboos and shit. I don't say this too often, but Say Uncle really offers unique content. How many times have you come up with a video showing a gay priest and a horny fucker who gets down on his knees and says Hallelujah while getting a facial? Don't get me started on the outdoor shenanigans of boy scouts or the theme of the movies on Dad Creep.
Get your money's worth
Bullyhim.com is a series of the award-winning gay network, and that means something in this corrupted, competitive adult business world. Say Uncle has been around long enough to get my attention, and that speaks volumes about the site's ability to raise cocks. Simply put, these guys know how to please the gay crowd and take good care of their members. Bullyhim.com might not be big enough, nor the kinkiest of all the series, but it's a start. If you are still not sold, just take a look at those models. An array of gays that look like they might be appealing to a homo's eyes.
Download pictures, watch videos, go for a full year, or be a sissy who spends one dollar on a one-day trial. Do whatever makes you happy! I don't give a fuck! All I know is that bullyhim.com presents a unique theme and that the guys look like they mean business. Big dicks and pulsating assholes, that's what you came here for. Well, you can have it for a handful of dollars! What a day to be gay! Sayonara!